hope
I've been here for months waiting
My time waste
My mind full of sadness
I've been drifting
Trying to remain afloat
Holding onto the only hope
I have left.
Monday, April 21, 2025
Monday, April 21, 2025 Monday. I went after breakfast this morning. I kept waking up last night. I'm anxious about everything. I want to do so much and I want to do nothing at the same time. I'm avoiding things. I've always avoided things. This morning I found out that someone I once knew died several years ago. It's strange this weight of missing someone. I've always met people who I automatically wanted to be around. This attraction is not a sexual attraction but something more meaningful. I don't know how it works. I don't know why the people I clinge to are the people that I want to be around... I do know now that my connection with certain people is from me being Autistic. I'm not good at communicating with people. I don't randomly message people too often. There have been people who I wish I had talked to more. There's people that I wish I could spend time with again. Some of these people are now dead. I hate being alone most of the time...
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